I am a British Asian and my family background is from India. So I can only really talk about my personal experience in life and probably most of you girls out there would be able to relate with this blog post.
Its the hardest thing in this world is to be a girl. We come in to this world fighting because there a lot of people out there who would favour a boy over a girl. And they think it’s the worst possible thing to happen to them to have a daughter.
We fight all throughout our life up until the point we aren’t here anymore. We have to struggle with periods and then with those periods come other gynaecology issues such as miscarriages, infertility, painful periods you think you would die. I mean the list is endless really. Then other problems arise in our lives.
For some girls it’s from a young age and others girls it’s when they get to the right age. But we get the question constantly when are you going to get married? Have you found the one yet? If you can’t find someone we will do it for you. It’s like you’ve just finished your education and next thing you get a parade of boys in front of you.
I got married when I was 24 years old and I personally think that’s so young. I didn’t know what wanted out of life heck I still don’t know. But I feel if I waited then maybe I would have more sense of what I wanted. It’s like ok I got married and no word of a lie within the same month of being married I started getting the when are you having kids then. I have been married for 4 years and I still get the when are you having kids question.
It’s like we get so much pressure our whole lives. It’s like we just live in a world of pressure. Whether that’s from our own families, our in laws families or even extended families.
I am glad I am waiting to have kids because it’s given me and my husband time to find ourselves and each other. I would like to have kids but my body isn’t cooperating.
For the last year I put so much pressure on myself to get pregnant that I was actually starting to effect myself and my marriage. I was so stressed that I needed to do this and it didn’t even become about me it became about everybody else.
Furthermore, it’s like tomorrow when I have kids and say hypothetically I have all daughters I know people will think it’s there right to say to me well you should have a boy! It’s like screw you! First you tell when to married, then when to have a kid and now the gender of my kid.
I think people are honestly fucked up in the head to think it’s ok to give there opinion and then force their opinion on you!
As a girl you are born in this world to please others and not do anything for yourself. I really hope the next generation doesn’t have to go through that scrutiny that we all have grown up with!
So let’s move forward, get married when we want. Have a kid when we want or heck don’t have a kid! Just do what you want. If you want to get wasted drunk every night do it. If you want to go out and get with a different guy to do it! If you want to just chill in the comfort of your house with your dozen pets do it! Like do what makes you happy and not what makes others happy!
I’m done living my stressed life for others with their opinions and will do what I want!
